A Lonely Path That Impacts Everyone

“Even though you have an amazing circle of care around you, you’re going through this all on your own. And you can’t process it, so you can’t articulate what’s happening to you, and what you’re feeling.”

Though her two children are now young adults, Hagley says her brain injury reminded her of the toddler years, when the inability to communicate comes out in emotions and fits of frustration: “I would just melt,” she describes.

Despite the lonely journey, Hagley recognizes that brain injuries deeply impact a survivor’s entire community. “My relationships have been profoundly impacted during this journey of recovery,” she says. “Overnight, all of my home tasks and responsibilities were thrust upon my husband and children. Similarly, my workplace duties, as an educator and Department Head, also needed transferring to colleagues, impacting professional relationships.”

Her family is still working through their own personal traumas that have stemmed from the accident.

“It has taken, and continues to take, a great personal and emotional effort to process and manage the guilt of knowing your accident has caused so much pain,” says Nicole.

During the bike accident, Nicole’s sunglasses embedded into her face, requiring surgery.

“Once my face healed, then I came into the world of an invisible disability.”

Today, Nicole has healed enough to look normal and perform social norms. But every day is still a struggle. “I can’t process information in the moment,” she says. A task that used to take seconds, like writing an email, can take 15 minutes or more.

The world, Nicole says, can simply be too loud. As she recovered, she longed for quiet where the chaos in her brain could calm down. Eventually, through the help of yoga, meditation, and physiotherapy, along with the unflagging support of her family and care providers, she is on the path to healing. “There is still a way to go in this healing, yet I can’t believe how far I have come.”